Emotional Blackmail
By Susan Forward
When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation, and Guilt to Manipulate You. HarperCollins Publishers, 2001.
Summary of Emotional Blackmail book by Susan Forward
A no-nonsense guide to relationships tinged by a form of manipulation called emotional blackmail, providing clear steps and a plethora of practical examples to allow victims to take back control and regain their self-worth.
Chapters in Emotional Blackmail book summary
What do you get from this book? How to recognize, prevent, and recover from emotional blackmail
Emotional blackmail involves using intimate knowledge of a person’s fears and vulnerabilities to exert control in all types of relationships
All emotional blackmail has the same purpose, but there are four distinct types of blackmailers who use different control techniques
Emotional blackmail destroys the trust in a relationship, using fear, obligation, and guilt as a means of exerting control
Blackmailers fear frustration and hate to lose, and will use emotional blackmail to maintain a connection with you
When you repress emotions, you build up inner hot buttons, which blackmailers don’t hesitate to use for their own purposes
To change the way you deal with blackmail, you must change both your behavior and your deeply held beliefs
Break a blackmailer’s demand into parts and consider each aspect separately, while asking yourself some difficult questions
Strategies such as non-defensive communication are the key to taking back control of the conversation
Fear, obligation, and guilt leave you vulnerable to emotional blackmail, so it's time to turn off the fog
Summary of the key insights
Selected critiques in brief
Final word
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Emotional Blackmail — Book Summary Snapshot
Who should read Emotional Blackmail book
- Psychologists
- social workers
- grandparents
- anyone wanting to stand up to manipulation
- anyone wanting to repair a toxic relationship
About the author of Emotional Blackmail
Susan Forward
Susan Forward is a therapist and author with extensive experience and knowledge about toxic relationships, having previously penned bestselling books about unhealthy parent-child and love relationships including Toxic Parents and Men Who Hate Women.
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